by Kathleen McKenna
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Hullo all,
Wishing you a Happy Halloween.
My, I have had a series of strange events befall me recently. As many of you know I have been either privileged (or cursed depending on how one sees it) to travel back and forth between our world and the mad and magic world of Wonderland.
Often this sort of thing befalls me when I am doing nothing more than straightening my ribbon in front of the looking glass and inadvertently fall in.
Last Tuesday this very thing happened. One moment I was in my own bedroom and the next I found myself tumbling through the air, I saw a young girl dash by and she rudely shouted at me in an appalling American accent,
girl; you’re in the shiz now.
Honestly, I don’t know how Yanks can bear to listen to themselves! At any rate I fell and spun for what seemed hours, having to hold down my skirt for modesty's sake as I passed many strange looking, lascivious creatures with an unearthly gleam in their eyes. At long last I came to rest on a patch of red and muddy ground. Stuck into said ground was a rudely painted sign which read:
Lettered below it read,
Welcome to Louisiana.
Unfamiliar with such bizarre names, I brushed myself off and wandered for hours through a world so strange and foreign as to make even Liverpool seem a place of sense and sensibility.
At long last I came upon a rather astounding house; a mansion really. Outside upon the steps sat an alarming looking creature ─ a man who wasn't truly a man, but a man-wolf.
He smelled rather badly and as I approached him I noted he was smoking from a small pipe. Seeing this I was heartened, hoping that he might know my friend the caterpillar who also likes a pipe now and again. The strange creature raised his head and stared at me with muddied red eyes and this is what he said:
Why is you staring?
What don’t you understand?
Drugs is bad and a wolf should know it too.
and then he tried to eat part my head and said
for him this is what is true.
I was born a werewolf with fire in my veins.
I ate my father, a coyote and I was filled with shame.
I ate my mother because she said that I was gay.
Now I make porno films that all appreciate.
I ain’t a bad wolf though peoples disagree,
I'm just trying my best in a rough society!
I joined the army but they said don't ask, don't tell
I ate the recruiter, that rednecks now in hell
All I ever wanted was to make a wonderbra!
But people they don’t get me so then I show the claw.
A werewolf’s life ain’t easy though some would disagree.
And now I gives the people drugs and good pornography.
I try to be real pleasin’ and some would say I is.
But if you all don’t like me,
well I'll eats you same as if I was a Griz!
Truly it was a MOST alarming day! Safely back in England now I have this to say: Wonderland is fraught with many dangers true, but the State of Louisiana is wracked with weirder things and that my friends is true.
~end
Were post created for October Trix-n-Treatz by Kathleen McKenna
© 2010. All rights reserved.
by Kathleen McKenna
~-~-~-~-~ guest ~-~-~-~-~
by Kathleen McKenna
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