Thursday, October 13, 2011

Giveaway: A Clockwork Vampire by K.H. Koehler

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by K.H. Koehler
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“Attention: Passengers. We are entering an unexpected wormhole. Please remain calm and seated.”

Easy for you to say, you think cryptically as you shrink back into your seat. You swallow about four Xanax and grit your teeth as the shuttle that was supposed to take you to a sci-fi convention at one of the new lunar hotels makes a sudden detour. It lurches suddenly, then spins like a badly weighed load of laundry as it’s swallowed by a giant vacuum existing in both time and space.

A half hour later, your pilot wrestles the shuttle through some angry grey cloud cover and you see the earth glittering far below, but it’s not the earth you know, the earth you grew up on. The earth you’ve left behind. For one thing, once you land and the passengers began to deplane the shuttle, you see something very peculiar. The walls of the terminal churn with a bizarre jigsaw of clockwork parts and a low, cold, London-esque fog seems to cling to everything. Women are dressed in long bustled gowns, and men prance by you, dressed in tweed suits and top hats. They stop to check the time on their watch fobs. They sport canes and spats. Their female companions carry parasols and wear huge feathered hats.

There’s a man in the terminal reading a newspaper, but he’s at least eight feet tall and looks, well, rather shaggy. Across the terminal you spot a man under suspicion. Five men in security uniform wrestle him against a wall in order to search his possessions, but instead of complying with them, he starts to morph into a creature half man and half leopard. The guards drag the were-leopard off while he screams about suing them and about his civil rights as a US citizen. One of the guards asserts that he has no rights.

Besides you stands a man who looks made up mostly of prosthetic clock parts. His head swivels to and fro hydraulically as he searches for his flight number on the lighted departure board.

OK, you think, I’m gonna stay calm. No need to get excited. Right?

You look around sheepishly, luggage in hand, and spot your name on a placecard being held up by a tall blond man. He’s quite the looker, young, not at all threatening. Maybe he knows what’s going on? Where did that damn wormhole deposit you? You feel like you’re in Wonderland…in some alternate, gadget-crazy, monster-ridden sci-fi universe. You start toward him, then realize he’s sporting a pair of impressive bronze wings! He looks pale, even for a blond, and when he smiles, he makes a concentrated effort not to flash any fang. Whoa, you think. My ride’s a vampire!

You have a surreal moment of indecision like when you were a teen and you were reading a Choose Your Own Adventure book and had to make a split decision: Should you go with the vampire or run away? He smiles as he cuts a path toward you and shakes your hand.

“Hey there, I’m Cesar, and I’m your tour guide,” the vampire states in a friendly manner.

You jump at his icy handshake.

“Welcome to New York.” He smiles cheerily, picks up your ultra-heavy luggage like it’s made of foam rubber, and heads out of the terminal.

You sigh and hurry after him. Somehow you know this will not end well.

The vampire passes through the doors of the airport and crosses the street toward a peculiar-looking streetcar. It looks like a cross between an old-fashioned San Francisco trolley and a steam locomotive. The streets of New York are packed with people and filled with more of that low-lying steam. You can barely see anyone through it all. Tall, art-deco-style buildings rear up on all sides of you, and everywhere you look you see people, monsters, and a few that look in between.

Oh man, you think as you board the steam trolley with Cesar, I am so not in Kansas anymore…


Guest post created for October Trix-n-Treatz event by K.H. Koehler, author of A Clockwork Vampire
© 2011. All rights reserved.

Want to learn more about Mrs. McGillicuddy’s world of steampunk vamps and high technology?

DOWNLOAD: The Clockwork Companion: A Free Guide to Mrs. McGillicuddy's World Includes an original short story, excerpt, playlist, glossary, and introduction to steampunk literature by Louise Bohmer.

Visit KH:

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by K.H. Koehler
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READ more about Mrs. McGillicuddy here...

--~ Book Giveaway courtesy of author ~--

A Clockwork Vampire
by K.H. Koehler

Win a copy of this book!

2 winners: 1-ebook OR 1-print

Open to all.

Offer ends: November 13, 2011

TO DO: (3-parts)

1. ONE of these:

ADD this book to your Goodreads


LIKE this book on amazon.


TWEET this: (or click the twitter button on this post)
Giveaway: A Clockwork Vampire by K.H. Koehler

2. Tell me which version you want ebook or print?

3. AND, let me know in comments what you did along with your email (if I don't already have it)


* image source

-+0+o+ October Trix-n-Treatz schedule +o+0+-


  1. This one looks really good! I liked it on Amazon! Thanks for the giveaway.

  2. Definitely want the print (But I'm not picky. LOL). Tweeted, added to Goodreads, AND shared on Facebook.

  3. Steampunk vamps, sounds great. I've added this title to Goodreads. Print copy please.

  4. I added it to my goodreads. I would like it in print.

  5. I added it to my Goodreads list. Ebook for me, please! bert501(at)hotmail(dot)com

  6. The book looks amazing.

    Added to Goodreads.

    I'd love a print copy thank you.


  7. Love the cover! and vampires? VAMPIRES!$; anyway

    1) I added to goodreads: aliraluna
    2) An ebook! >;B

    thanks for this awesome giveaway!

  8. I LIked the book on Amazom

    I would like a print version

    Thanks for the giveaway.

    Carol T

    buddytho {at} gmail DT com

  9. added to goodreads
    I'd prefer print but I'm ok with either

  10. I'd like a print copy. Thanks!

    added the book to my Goodreads shelf (Dovile on GR)

    spamscape [at] gmail [dot] com

  11. This book looks really good!! I would love to win a print copy :)

    I liked it on Amazon.

    jwitt33 at live dot com

  12. I think I've died and gone to nirvana :)
    I'd like the print version.


  13. I loved the post today and The Clockwork Vampire is intriguing. This is a new to me author and I would love to read K.H. Koehler's work. Thank you for sharing today and for the awesome giveaway opportunity - I would love an ebook :)

    I tweeted (ZDz59001):


  14. I tweeted:!/aikchien/status/125115553936457728

    I'd love to have a print version.

    aikychien at yahoo dot com

  15. Tweeted it.

  16. Thank you everyone for your support! :-)

  17. Added to goodreads to read shelf.
    Ebook please - kindle version.

  18. Steampunk plus vampire, what's not to like? Added it my wishing on a book shelf in GR. ;) And had to had to tweet it! I would prefer the printed version, as I love to inhale pages. Yup, don't judge me!!/RNClementson/status/129970440608301056Rinni @ Rinni'sPlayground

  19. I would love to win a print copy of this book, it sounds like it will really be good!

    I liked it on Amazon and added it to my wishlist there.

    Thank you for the chance to win!

  20. This book looks so good, i added it to Goodreads. I would really like print.

  21. I "Liked" A Clockwork Vampire on Amazon.

    I'm looking forward to reading this book, it sounds fantastic. I'd love a print copy.

    Barbed1951 at aol dot com

  22. Liked on Amazon as Sarah Bibi Setar

  23. 1. Liked on amazon
    2. print version, please
    3. marlenebreakfield(at)yahoo(dot)com

  24. Thanks for this amazing giveaway! I would love to win a print copy of this book!

    klaxon63350 (at) mypacks (dot) net

  25. Thank you for the giveaway!
    I liked the amazon page as melora brock. I would prefer ebook- kindle.
    melorabrock {at} gmail {dot} com

  26. Thanks for the giveaway. I tweeted it. I'd like a print copy.

  27. I'm intrigued. Love Vampires and steampunk, count me in. I liked the book on Amazon, and added the book to my GoodReads and Tweeted the contest.

    I love print books, but e-book formats for my Kindle are fine, too. Thanks for the chance to win. :)

    kmnbooks at yahoo dot com

  28. I added on GoodReads & Liked on Amazon. I'd prefer a print copy.

    My email is:


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