Showing posts with label John A. Allen. Show all posts
Showing posts with label John A. Allen. Show all posts

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Zombie News Flash: Subject S


Transcription of recording received...

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by John Allen
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The recent zombie outbreak has led to some interesting observations. First and foremost is the ability of the zombies to actually heal themselves by eating human flesh. I intercepted this report from a researcher in the military base south of the first outbreak.

Notes: Thanks to recent advanced studies in brain mapping, we’ve been able to restore some memories from Subject 1E3L-2. These memories are only available in audio format, as mapping the visual portion of the memories requires substantially more processing power than provided by [lab name redacted]. The recording features the voices of the subject and [name redacted].

Subject (S): “Holy Crap. Are we safe?”

[Name Redacted] (NR), whispering: “I think so. There’s a pretty large group of them outside our window.”

S: “Fuck. Let’s start shooting.”

NR: “Shut up! Keep your cool. They won’t know we’re in here. The blinds are closed. All we have to do it wait it out.”

S: “We’re trapped! We’re completely surrounded! We’re going to die!”

NR: “Sshhh! Seriously, man! Shut the fuck up. You are going to get us killed.”

Researcher notes a few minutes of silence followed by the sound of breaking glass.

S: “Shit! They’re in!”

NR: “Damnit, shut up.”

Researcher notes several loud shotgun blasts in close proximity, followed by muffled audio and tinnitus.

S: “There are too many of them!”

Researcher notes three more blasts, followed by moans and screaming. Should also note that the second blast seems to come from somewhere more distant. Possibly another gunman? After the shotgun blast, sounds of struggle ensue. Subject can be heard striking objects, presumably his attackers, and running. The subject apparently finds a safe place and barricades himself in it. Near the end of the recovered audio, the subject apparently calls his companion from an available phone.

S: [Name Redacted]! I need your help, man!Where are you! I’m surrounded. Trapped in the second story hallway. I’m out of ammo, man! Help! One of them bit me! Are you up here? I’m not feeling so good, man. I’m scared as shit and my arm is really burning. Fuck! It’s like fire! It’s spreading!

Subject screams loudly and starts making a commotion. Researcher notes the sound of an opening door and grunting. At this point, possibly due to the infection, the audio is increasingly difficult to recover, being interrupted by bits of unintelligible gibberish. The last bit of recoverable audio is perhaps the most telling and most gruesome.

NR: “Holy shit, there you are. Are you okay? We are fucked man.

Researcher notes that the subject does not respond, only growling.

NR: “No way, man, cut that shit out. You are not one of them.”

Researcher notes that the recoverable audio ends with the sounds of a struggle. A voice can be heard screaming, then gurgling, then being replaced by a loud crunching sound as I suppose the sounds of bones being crushes must sound as amplified through the skull. After that point the audio is unrecoverable.

~end

Subject (S) by John Allen
Based on character from Fried Green Zombies. © 2009. All rights reserved.

~-~-~-~-~ guest ~-~-~-~-~
by John Allen
~-~-~-~-~ guest ~-~-~-~-~


*** Zombie Book Giveaway courtesy of author ***

Fried Green Zombies
by John A. Allen

sign up for this book giveaway


~*~

* image source zombies

=== September Zombies schedule of events
with links to posts and giveaways from the other Zombiettes===


Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Fried Green Zombies by John A. Allen

Fried Green Zombies
by John A. Allen

Published: 2009
Genre: Action, Comedy, Scifi, Zombies
Paperback: 262 pages
Rating: 5

Description from the amazon:
Bovina is a sleepy little town, until two friends find themselves battling truck-driving zombies, aliens, and dirty cops after finding a beauiful, busty burqa-bedecked stranger standing on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere. Aided by a classic computer nerd and a crazy man wielding a frying pan, follow Chett and Harry as they battle their way across the rural countryside and ultimately save the world. Or do they?

My two-bits:
In-a-word(s): hardheaded hot dogs

I found this a fun read with some shoot-em-up scenes and otherworldly and unmentionable characters. Of course, what really got me was the humor.

Kindle version is currently available for $2.39 here.

OR try your luck here...

*** Zombie Book Giveaway courtesy of author ***

Win the book.

Open to all.

Offer ends: September 30, 2010

TO DO (2-parts):

1. Sign guestbook (if you haven't already).

2. Visit John's site and tell me something you learned about him.

OR

Download the pdf for free, at John's site. Yes, you can!

OR

Listen to the free podcast version. It's a riot ;-D

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Contest has ended - winner is here

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=== September Zombies schedule of events
with links to posts and giveaways from the other Zombiettes===


Zombie News Flash: Interview with Clayton Hensworth


Just in from the vvb news room...

Interview with Clayton Hensworth by John Allen


JA: So, tell me about a day in your life.

Clayton: Life? What life? Other than my overbearing mom and getting picked on all the time, the only life I have is online playing “Deities of Destruction.”

JA: How’s college going?

Clayton: It’s going as well as it can. I mean, I’m really too smart for the junior college that I’m currently attending, but I’ve got big plans. Going to get my degree in computer programming and go on to get a masters and hopefully a doctorate.

JA: This from the kid who blew up his daddy’s shed?

Clayton: (Grimaces) I’ve tried to move past that. Can we not bring that up? It’s not my fault that explosives are so much fun. I can’t live that down. Even the guys in class pick on me about that. Especially these two guys, Chett and Harry.

JA: The troublemakers?

Clayton: Yep. It’s tough to get a bead on them, though. Because they actually seem good-natured. They said they were going to take me out for drinks.

JA: Why would Chett and Harry volunteer for that?

Clayton: What’s that supposed to mean? I help them out at test time, and they said they want to repay me. Introduce me to some women.

JA: Let me know how that goes.

Clayton: Well, when the world comes to an end and it’s up to the computer geek to save the world, don’t count on my help.

JA: Like that’s ever going to happen.

~end

Interview with Clayton Hensworth by John Allen
Based on character from Fried Green Zombies. © 2009. All rights reserved.

~-~-~-~-~ guest ~-~-~-~-~
by John Allen
~-~-~-~-~ guest ~-~-~-~-~


*** Zombie Book Giveaway courtesy of author ***

Fried Green Zombies
by John A. Allen

sign up for this book giveaway


~*~

* image source zombies

=== September Zombies schedule of events ===


 
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